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Payment up-front and deposit for travel expenses

Why is it almost universally accepted for an escort to take cash up front for his or her time? Why do I take payment for travel expenses before driving long distances to an out call?

These are topics for both the customer and escort guides, so I will be adding this article to both categories.

Customers pay on arrival before playing:

There is no reason for an escort not to expect payment for his or her time upon meeting the customer. The practice is accepted because it eliminates any doubt that payment might be dependent upon the customer’s subjective experience of the escort. Some customers do indeed wish to blur these boundaries, but service providers have by and large determined that these are the type of customers to be avoided. Even if the lead sounds genuine, their asking to essentially try before they buy is a sure warning sign to an experienced escort. So much so, that dropping this type of lead makes most economical sense against a backdrop of intentional fraudsters and tricky customers.

Taking payment upfront also time-links your payment protocol. If the customer seeks to overstay his original period, payment may be demanded for the added time beforehand. He is again, in no doubt that the amount paid is for the escort’s time and not his subjective experience of the escort, which is as yet undetermined. The customer is less able to use tricks to overstay his period and bargain further favours before he “parts with his cash”.

Out calls are obviously a more sensitive area, as an escort can just dash with the money if paid on arrival, and many have. I have always been happy to suggest that the customer just shows me the cash on arrival and leaves it in plain sight. If he is ultra-paranoid, he can leave it inside an upturned glass.

I have been caught out myself a few times for varying reasons:

  • In 2011, a man in Blackpool who contacted me through the formerly popular escort site,, pretended to pay into my account by opening up his online banking in my presence. When it emerged he had not paid, he blamed a technical error and promised to pay by cheque, which never arrived. His details were circulated to other advertisers.
  • A couple paid a cash voucher for my travel expenses to East Yorkshire. The appointment began in a rushed manner, and I made the mistake of trusting payment to the end of the meeting because a deposit had already been made. The request was (for reasons I now know) for me to fuck the girlfriend very hard, to which she consented and repeatedly forced herself almost bruisingly onto me at the end of the appointment – as if I had yet to use enough force. Afterwards, the male customer did not pay and threatened that his partner would report me to the police for “rape”, something he had clearly preconceived as he messaged beforehand, purporting to be his partner! I did inform local police as I felt that I would be safer making first complaint, felt defrauded and had concerns over a potentially abusive relationship. Whilst this was technically fraud (obtaining services dishonestly), these cases are not a policing priority unless large sums of money or a pattern of behaviour are involved.
  • I have had various “trusting” relationships where I was always paid on departure. These are far from ideal, however it may seem appropriate to take payment after services rendered if it helps appease the customer’s emotional state by making the arrangement look less “formal”. If a customer is emotionally fragile, depressed, or has just run out of money whilst still helplessly craving your attention, it is easy to see how this type of agreement can go wrong. This happened once, in bizarre circumstances with the (now deceased) Bishop of a small liberal church in Scotland – who was already known privately for producing porn videos with sex workers and running a male escort’s business in Glasgow!

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Customers pay a deposit equivalent to travel expenses for long distance out calls:

I generally require this from new customers who call me over 40-60 minutes from home.

Commonly an excuse for escort ad scams, customers should vet the advertiser along the following lines before paying in:

  • Do they have good reason to demand the deposit? Good reason could be train tickets costing over £20, a two hour drive or a service request that involves the sourcing of clothing or fetish gear. It is also reasonable to ask for a deposit if a customer has already made an arrangement with and cancelled, or requires that the escort arrange a three way with another worker.
  • Is the deposit proportionate to the costs incurred upfront? A common sign of a scam is that the escort is new to the scene and demands well over his actual travel costs. A reasonable amount for a driver is 25p per mile return or 2x the cost of petrol if the escort drives.
  • Is the escort an established advertiser with good feedback over many years? I always point out that because this applies to me, I have no reason to scam customers out of small money whilst risking my reputation and livelihood. Customers should take care to establish that feedback is credible and has not been canvassed, as there have been problems with male escorts systematically canvassing for feedback recently. If in doubt, perhaps consider using a mutually trusted escort as escrow, paying him a small additional fee. I sometimes do this for my customers when they distance-call new escorts. This does require that the advertiser trusts my judgement and is aware that my relationship with his new customer is such that he can not BS me to refund the ticket money if he meets but doesn’t like the escort.

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Updated Feb/2019 (07867 672229)

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